When I was younger, I used to draw. I would find videos on YouTube and copy tutorials step by step. Every time I finished a piece, I felt accomplished, like I had created something that was truly mine. However, somewhere along the way, I found that I couldn’t dedicate as much time to this hobby as I wanted to. As we grow older, our priorities change, life gets busy, and some things get left behind. But when does it get to the point where you have to give up the things that bring you joy? When does it get to the point where you have to stop doing something you love?
I can’t pinpoint if art was my passion, but I know I enjoyed it: sketching, coloring, painting— all of it. I even started designing dresses and drawing them on paper models. I liked using the creative side of my brain, and nobody ever told me to stop. In fact everyone around me encouraged having a passion or something you enjoy. But over time, I stopped giving art much attention. It wasn’t intentional; it just happened.
In small ways, I still try to devote some of my time to this hobby. I make simple drawings or sketches, and these moments bring me joy. However, I can’t dedicate hours towards a piece the way I used to. I’ve never stopped loving it; it’s just harder to create space for it.
As I grew older, my priorities changed. School, grades, extracurriculars, and socials all consume my time. When making decisions, you’re always losing something, and it depends on how much one thing is valued in your life. The harsh reality, however, is that almost everyone judges you based on your achievements, your image, your “value”. If this hobby doesn’t account for your future aspirations, is it worth giving it much time? A lot of people have passions that started off as hobbies and may have now turned into their careers, which is amazing. But it’s important to remember that this often happens because they were exceptionally talented or because they chose to prioritize their hobby over anything else. This isn’t practical for everyone.
Perhaps more than anything, my interest in drawing started to fade. I couldn’t give it the commitment and dedication it needed. I didn’t love it enough to create space for it, but I didn’t hate it enough to forget it. It just gets overlooked in my everyday life. However, I now find that I want to change that. At times, it’s hard to remember that you don’t have to choose between fully dedicating yourself to something you love or fully giving it up to focus on other priorities. Maybe it can just be something you come back to, so it can lighten up your mood or help you enjoy the little moments in life. Maybe some things are just meant to give us enjoyment and add a spark to our lives.
I want to draw again. I want to create a space for it in my schedule, to feel the joy of spreading colors across a page, and letting pencil strokes turn into something unexpected. Even if it’s just for a few minutes, I want to do it. It doesn’t have to consume my time, or be a huge commitment— I merely want to do it because I enjoy it. After all, it makes me whole.
Photo credit: Rawpixel and Sakarin Sukmanatham
